35 Qualities Of A Good Wife

How To Be Better Wife?

I’m getting close to four years, but I have to say, day one of you becoming a wife, you are already learning the tools of being a good wife. I remember learning about your husband literally like day one, or I guess the day after being married to Karen and already realizing some of his expectations for me.

To fulfill in his life and understanding ways that I can better our relationship better our life together. So even though in the grand scheme of things, Lord willing, four years of marriage isn’t a very long time. I feel like I’ve learned a lot, and Lord knows I’m still learning. I’m always learning what it takes to be a good wife to your husband.

I see an impact on my marriage. I want to start more of a sit-down talking wife series sharing about what I’m going through, what I’m doing for Karen, and stuff like that. Because like I said, I’m always learning, and there’s still stuff happening in my marriage, and a lot of time, I want to share it with a lot of people.

Usually, I share it with some of my close friends or sisters. But here on this platform, I have tremendous ability, and I even would call this a huge blessing to share what I’ve learned the hard way. I’m not a perfect wife, but I strive every day to be the wife Kieran needs me to be.

35 Qualities Of A Good Wife

I hope you guys like this article. Let me know what’s up with you down below. Let me know what you do. Tell me one thing you do for your husband that your husband appreciates whether he knows it or not. So we’re going to go ahead and get started!

1. Physical Affection

Growing up, I remember being like four, five, and six and hanging out at family functions or church functions or groups or whatever. I’d see a man and a woman, and I would think of them like that and would have no idea they were married because they showed no signs of physical affection towards each other.

I would never see them hug or hold hands or lean into each other like sitting beside each other. I encourage you as a wife that absolutely behind closed doors.

2. Touch Your Husband

It’s essential to have an intimate physical relationship with your husband. But all the more so when you’re in public and when you’re with people. I’m not talking about intense PDA because that’s uncomfortable for everybody. But sitting beside your husband leaning into your husband holding, your husband’s hand touching, your husband.

It’s all significant guys who are huge into physical touch. Most guys don’t realize how to take it in and work with it. But when you touch your husband in public, you’re not touching him and making him feel good.

You’re showing everyone around that, hey this is my husband, and I am crazy about him. You’re giving that guy tons of self-confidence. There is nothing like being married to a very confident man. So I encourage you to embrace your husband in public.

3. Do Respect

I want to talk about respecting your husband, and this is a huge thing that is key to an excellent marriage relationship. Guys need respect more than anything else.

They need connection more than love. That’s how guys are wired. So as wives, as soon as we go the opposite direction and decide not to put our trust in them to see them as incapable of belittling them.

You’re going to find your husband being defeated, and trust me, you don’t want to be married to a defeated man. It is a horrible feeling that affects your kids if you have them, and obviously, it transforms him as a husband will make him go ahead.

He should have full confidence knowing my wife respects me and realizes who I am and my role as a husband-wife.

4. Be Confident

As a wife, we need to be our husband’s confidant, and they are to be ours. Guys don’t spill their emotions very quickly. But that one time a year when your husband needs to talk to you or vent or something’s been on his mind.

He’s going crazy. Stop listening to him, and don’t say anything till he’s done. Listen and answer okay or further help him out. If you feel like he needs it, what he tells you is not to be shared amongst your girlfriends or your mom or other wife friends. He needs to know that his heart and what’s on his mind, and his secrets are safe with you.

The more you have this attitude towards your husband pouring himself out and venting to you, the more he’ll be willing to do it, and the more trust and security. He’ll put into you, and that is a huge blessing and something inspiring for a wife to have in her husband.

5. Learn Love Language

Know what your husband’s love language is and feed it. When I first married Karen, I knew that his love language was physical touch and closeness. I knew that mine wasn’t, and it still is not, but a physical touch and proximity with Karen if I withhold anything. I’m not giving him what he needs. I’m depriving him of such a vast, enormous way to show him that I love him.

When I passed Karen, I touched Karen. If he’s sitting on the couch and I have time, I’ll sit on the couch next to him. If we’re walking side by side holding Kieran or holding his hand, this makes the guy go crazy.

According to Chapman, the five ways to express and experience love called “love languages” are:

• Quality Time Spent.
• Words Of Affirmation.
• Acts Of Service.
• Receiving Gifts.
• Physical Touch.

I encourage you to find your husband’s love language and fuel it on an everyday basis on the other note.

6. Give Space

Your husband needs space, especially with kids. Sometimes Karen can come home and feel like, oh, there’s the stuff that needs to be done. Because kids are at his feet, and I’m making dinner, something happens with the kids. He needs to step in when you can give your husband space.

When you feel like he needs it, you should know your husband needs space right now. Give him space, don’t suffocate him. I’ve learned with Kieran when he comes home, if you need a shower here, go ahead and shower.

He works all the time too, and he needs some space to think about nothing, which a lot of guys organize his thoughts or relax. So give your guys some space. It’s not bad if they desire that, and don’t be offended if they do. A lot of time, I need my space. It’s healthy, and it’s not a bad thing,

7. Don’t Stop Giving

There are always points in a marriage where you feel like you’re giving more or this person is giving less never. Firstly, never compare what one person gives versus the other focus on yourself. As wives, most of us are homemakers.

I’m going like, you’re not pulling your weight or something like that. That’s wrong, and my heart is in the wrong place. Now I don’t think it’s good for husbands to be lazy.

They need to realize there’s a need here. Let me help. But give them the ability to see the need and help instead of always carrying you’re doing less than me.

I also remember husbands are learning like us. But I encourage you instead of looking at your partner and going the only gift 50%, and they give 20%, flip and give 5%. Look at yourself and provide everything you can absolutely.

8. Never Stop Learning

Never think that you’ve got your husband figured out, and that’s it. You’re set for the rest of your life. I still have my parents coming over and being like, and you would never guess what your mom did or like my mom.

I can, you see her your dad, and they’re still learning about each other after being married for 30-plus years. Make your husband an ongoing research assignment. That way, you can cater to his needs, and it’s also enjoyable.

There are so many things that I learn about Kyra. I’m like, you have got to be kidding me like how could I not know whether it’s something fundamental. What you’re going to find out is so fun in a marriage.

9. Be Interesting

I encourage you as a wife to be interesting. When Kiran looks at me, it’s like she’s Sarah Kieran looks at me as someone exciting.

He wants to spend time with me, and he wants to ask me questions. He’s always taken me on as a research assignment: this woman that I’ve married.

I like being attractive to Kieran because it makes our relationship fun. Being beautiful can cover many things. Keep changing things up to be interesting when your husband comes home.

Make your home an exciting place to come home. I can’t say I’m the most interesting person and the work of but Karen thinks I’m attractive. I have to work on it. Sometimes I do feel like I get into this weird rut.

So I would say this is very pivotal or something significant. But being attracted to your husband make some marriage exciting and fun.

10. Accept Help

When does he ask do you need help with this? Can I help you with this? 90% of the time, I say yes, please. even if I don’t need it. Something beautiful about marriage is another person willing to help another person. Another person is sacrificing for another person.

So even when I don’t need Karen’s help, I will still say yes if you can help me, sweet. Because nine times out of 10, it will make my life easier. I never want to get to that point where I’ve said no to him wanting to help me.

Karen is not an act of service type of guy. He does in a little bit of way. He likes doing certain things for me that are helpful. But I wouldn’t say he’s vast into that type of a love language. But he still feels somewhat defeated or little when I have a million things going on. He says Sarah let me help you. I want to show you that I love you. Let me help you.

I need Karen’s help, and if I say no, I’m also much too confident in myself. So accept your husband’s help. I’m struggling with this, and you’re brilliant.

Go ahead and get into this. A lot of the time, the husband will want to do that for you. When they do it, show appreciation out the wazoo praise your husband. When he helps you and shows him affection too, that would give him more drive to help you more in the future.

11. Don’t Compare

It is enormous tons of guys and girls, but many husbands already deal with that self-confidence. I wish you wore outfits like that instead of the usual clothes you wear! Why do you have to act like that like my dad never worked, like that with my mom?

Don’t say those things? Your husband doesn’t need you to compare him to anybody anything, any fictional character. Your husband desires your praise. I’m sure you have to dig deep to find something to compliment your husband.
I encourage you to dig so deep and find something your husband doesn’t want you to compare him to other people.

Your husband wants your affirmation, full confidence, and desire to be for him. Because as soon as you start comparing him to all these other things, he’s going. Why are you looking at all these other things?

Why are you putting so much attention on these other things? You forget about me guys are softies too. Guys, aren’t these like crazy rough and tough people. They need affection, and they need to be treated a certain way.

When you start comparing your husband to other things or people again, they feel defeated and belittled. And that’s another huge part of the whole respecting your husband. You are sure to have such a happier husband in marriage instead of focusing on everything.

12. Never Speak Badly

Never speak badly about your sweetheart. Now, this is an easy one to violate because sometimes you don’t feel all that great about yourself. You might say something like, “I’m so…” Whatever.

Okay, that doesn’t affect you. Because your husband who loves you, you’re his sweetheart, and you’re bad-mouthing her, that ticks guys off quicker than about anything that. For me, it’s hard for me to see my sweet being down.

13. Enjoy Every Moment

Enjoy what’s happening now. It’s so easy for all of us to get sucked into the future and what’s going to happen or the past and what’s already happened. Those spaces are fraught with anxiety on the future side and depression or shame on the past side.

Stay in the now and be fully present. It is crucial for moms and wives because the greatest gift you can give to your husband or your children is to be fully present with them.

14. Make Him Superman

Please give him a Superman cape. Okay, not you don’t go down to the costume shop and get him a Superman cape. But use that as a little analogy.

I got to hear Dr. Scott Holtzman talk, and he’s done a lot of research on marital relations and what men want and what women want, and those are always generalizations. But he’s onto something with this.

Typically, for men, what they want in a relationship is to feel valued. Think that they’re the hero, the superman. That your life is better because he’s in it. That’s what by buying him a Superman cape.

Let him know that your experience is better because he’s in it. It has a magical effect, and you’re going to like what you see.

15. Give Value

There is some divine power in gratitude. I’m talking about how to be a better wife and mother. You already feel the appreciation. Express it.

Let your kids know that you appreciate them for the good things that they’re doing. Especially with our kids because it’s effortless to identify what they need to do better.

Husbands are sensitive to this as well. Sometimes even though you’re right, pointing out what he could do better has him feeling criticized.

Expressing appreciation puts that Superman cape back around his neck and elevates him to a place where he’s more likely to make improvements. That’s a little bit of a paradox. But think about it.

16. Control Online Addiction

What we were talking about earlier about being fully present. One of the biggest distractors from an existing relationship is an electronic device: your phone, your tablet.

We have these smartphones that keep us continuously connected. We have a FOMO. Do you know what FOMO is? Fear Of Missing Out. F-O-M-O.

You get a FOMO because you’re afraid that you might miss something on your social media feed. You know that checking your social media feed is going to the refrigerator.

Repeatedly, hoping that there’s something new in there and there never is. So let’s put down the device. Take conscious control over this because our habits sometimes have us pulling that device out when we could connect with those closest to us.

I’m not saying you have to stay away from it completely. But be aware of this over the next few days and see what happens.

17. Make Eye Contact

To connect physically visually with the people you love. Touch them, get eye contact. Be fully present with them. It will do wonders to improve your relationships to make an effort to connect. So, try a few things.

Like when you’re walking past your teenage son, reach out and touch him on the shoulder as you pass by. Try this with your husband. It’ll work even better with him.

Make eye contact as you’re talking to people. So that you’re not like the lights are on but nobody’s home. You’re engaged, you’re there. That’s powerful.

18. Give Time For Yourself

Time is a weird thing. We all have a limited supply. It comes down basically to 24 hours that repeats every day. You don’t get anymore, and you don’t get any less. Your time will be consumed with all kinds of things.

To make time for yourself means that you designate a few of those 24 hours to do something that lifts and enriches you. It is a gift that you can give to those who love you.

Because when you’re taking care of yourself, you can help take care of others. Make time for yourself. In that time that you’re making for yourself, take care of yourself. Take full responsibility for your emotional life also.

To rely on or depend on someone else for your happiness creates a drain for them and anxiety for you. You are responsible for your pleasure. Take care of yourself.

19. Spend Quality Time

Make time for them. I already talked to you about making time for yourself and taking care of yourself. It puts you in a position to show up for the people you love more powerfully. Make time for them. You’ve got so much on your list. You’ll have to designate it sometime specifically.

If you’ve got multiple children, make time for each one of them. Individually. Don’t forget, hubby, in this. He needs a little maintenance as well. So, make time for him too. It is a lot easier to do when you’re already taking care of yourself and making time for yourself. So, don’t skip that part.

20. Positive Attitude

Big surprise from Dr. Paul. Smile and be positive. Your positive energy will not only enhance your life and cause you to have more joy, but it will be a commanding presence and power for all of those around you for everyone who loves you and appreciates you for the good woman that you are. I was almost hesitant to write this article because I don’t know, you’re already awesome.

Be positive and always inspire your life partner. It helps you to create a strong bond and make your family happy. A negative attitude always spoils relations and the mind. So stay away from negative thoughts and be positive.

21. Give First Priority

We may think that we’re making out has not our number-one priority. He may not feel that way. You have to be careful and make sure that your husband.

He’s our number one priority, then he feels like and prioritizes things you know in your life to ensure that your husband is your number one priority.

You know God is our top priority, but your husband should prioritize more than your children after God. Then your family and all of those things that follow forth. But your husband should always be first.

22. Forgive Quickly

It’s so important that we forgive quickly and don’t hold grudges, and don’t take things into the next day. Those things can destroy your marriage and ruin your and your husband’s bond.

Most of the time, our ego makes us rude and selfish. We think this makes us small and priceless, but I suppose you might be wrong.

If you forgive your husband, then he feels guilty and shame. He can understand his fault and feel sympathy for you.

23. Praise Him

We praise our husbands because when we criticize, we’ll be the neck that makes them feel like they’re not good enough. That’s hard on anybody, especially men when they feel like they can’t please you.

So praise your husband and celebrate your husband instead of criticizing.

If you think that praise makes him lazy and moody, then you guess wrong. Your appreciation makes your husband active, which helps him do more hard work. To inspire him, praise him at any time.

24. Treat Yourself Like A Queen

It is so important. Ladies, we’ve got to take care of ourselves, and when I say take care of yourself and treat yourself like a queen.

Look like a queen. Act like a queen so that all that goes for having excellent hygiene should be common sense to people. But unfortunately, they aren’t so.

We must take care of ourselves. Every day make sure that you smell good, know that you wear clean clothes, and make sure that you treat yourself like a queen. So it would help if you weren’t exposing yourself to other people.

I won’t wear outside of the house because I don’t want to disrespect my husband. I want to be the sexiest woman he sees every day and the most beautiful woman he sees every day. So treat yourself like a queen.

25. Serve Food

We should serve our husbands. Don’t cook for your husband; you need to serve food to the husband. I always help my husband with his food.

I make sure that he has everything. He needs all his utensils if he needs any, you know, toppings or particular condiments for his food.

Make sure he has his drink, his napkins, and everything. Say, honey is there anything else that you need. Always make sure that you serve him to feel like a king.

26. Be Grateful

It is important that we don’t go off on the tangent and complain every day and talk about what we don’t have and what’s not done.

Be grateful for what you have with your husband, be grateful which you all have established together, for your family and joy.

If you compare your family with others, you can never find happiness and satisfaction. It also causes depression, anxiety, and sadness. So be happy with your family and friends.

27. Be Intimate

Intimacy is more than one thing. So when I say the intimate in all areas around intimacy is not sex. That is a form of affection, but you know we should be friendly with our husbands in our communication.

Your husband should feel like you are his wife and not one of his homeboys. Men like touchy women, and it’s a hormonal effect. When you touch or hug your husband, he feels exciting because of his sexual and mind hormones. We forget most of the time in a day, but we remember the intimate moments and memory.

28. Love Yourself

If you want to connect with your husband, you must love yourself first. I have been in a place in my life where I didn’t like myself. I didn’t want my body, and I didn’t like this, and I was not too fond of that. I was so critical of myself, like I honestly was, to the point where I could say I hated myself.

Twelve years ago, I was in the wrong place. Hugely overweight, very low self-esteem. My life was all about me. I was so focused on myself, and I got to the point where I didn’t like myself, and when I didn’t like myself, I built up this wall around myself, and I didn’t let anyone. Because I didn’t like myself.

If I didn’t love me, I couldn’t feel anyone else’s love. So, why would my husband want to give me love because I wasn’t receiving it? I was rejecting his love. He felt that from me, and because I denied my love for myself, I was rejecting his love from me. I couldn’t connect. I couldn’t love him, and I couldn’t feel him loved me.

I start liking you. Because when you want you, wow! Your relationship will explode. Because you’ll build the capacity to desire love. When you can love yourself, you’ll have the ability to connect and love your husband in a way you’ve never done before. So, love yourself first.

29. Be A Mind Reader

They have their point of view. You’re going to find this out in multiple ways. I had experienced only a couple of days ago. My husband and I had my point of view, and he had his point of view about the same situation. It was like a black and white difference.

I saw my way, he saw his way, and I like thinking, you know, in the situation, what happened. I expected him to apologize to me because I couldn’t believe what had happened. Guess what? He explained his side of the story, and he expected an apology from me.

I was like, “Are you kidding me? I’m not apologizing to you. You owe me an apology.” But the crazy thing was because we had two different points of view. So, at that moment, what I did was shut my mouth. I listened. I listened. It was tough to like to bite my tongue. Shove my lips because I wanted to express myself in that situation.

30. Be A Best Friend

How to make your husband want you all the time? I wanted to share it with him. I’m afraid that’s not right. What you’re thinking is wrong. It is what happened. But I did it. I listened to his point of view, and when he was done sharing his position, he hit his point of view with me. I still disagreed with it.

But it helped me to understand. Once I had realized, I realized you know what we both have a different point of view, and that’s okay.

It helped me to connect with him. Didn’t you know that it would have ultimately pushed us apart in the past? Because I would have opened my big mouth, I would have said what I wanted to say, and then we would have argued. Then we wouldn’t have talked for a day or a week or something.

Suppose you’ve ever been there before. But this time, I shut my mouth, and I listened. I recognized he has a point of view that I deserve to hear, or he deserves to have me attend. Even though I may not have agreed with it, I was willing to open my mind to know that he has his point of view, and that’s okay.

31. Be A Motivational Speaker

You can begin encouraging your husband, lifting him in affirming him. Take time to think about things that you appreciate about your husband.

You’re having a hard time taking that time and writing down something that you appreciate about him. It could be how he is affectionate. It could be how he provides, and it could be how he is with your guys as kids or other kids?

You can write a note and place it somewhere where he will find it later. You can tell him verbally in person and try not to text. It makes something unique, but not only will affirming him boost up your self-esteem and make him confident. Give him more confidence to do better in his role.

The more we focus on what they do, it does for us, the more happy. We will be happy in our relationship, and appreciation will boost them up and help them do more things. Because they don’t feel like they’re regularly doing something wrong, and they can never get it right. So focusing on the positive creates this significant momentum, other things continually improving.

32. Be A Supporter

You’re boosting him up and making him feel like he can do the right thing. He’s doing a good job, and it’s going to encourage him to keep making those habits and probably help him grow and do more loving things for you.

You can be affirming the husband’s things that he does for you and letting him know that he is loved and cared for. So that’s something super simple that you can start improving on today.

Ensure that you affirm your husband throughout the day and make it a goal for the next 30 days to compliment your husband on something at least once a day.

See how that changes his attitude? It’s going to put some pep in his step, and it’s going to make him feel so loved, and I wouldn’t be surprised if by the natural reaction.

You are also showed appreciation more as well. It’s a natural reaction when someone’s complimenting you and making you feel also uplifted to make them feel uplifted. It makes you feel loved by them, and that makes you super appreciative of that person because they are boosting your experience, so that’s a super simple way to be a better wife.

33. Good Conversation

If your husband likes to fish, then try to show some interest in that and try to offer to go fishing with him sometimes and be engaged. If your husband wants to talk politics, try to brush up on knowing what’s happening.

So you can participate in the conversation with him and besides hobbies. When your husband comes to you to talk to you and is ready to ask questions, don’t sidestep the conversation. It is super easy to do. That way and I’m like busy sometimes doing.

I’m talking, and it’s super easy for me to want to say okay to whatever he said. Not fully engaging in conversation, but that leads to your husband feeling rejected in like he won’t want to come to you. He feels shot down even though your intention or my intention at the moment isn’t necessarily to shut him down.

It’s to be productive in what I was doing but taking the time to stop what you’re doing and prioritize your relationship over household work or hobbies or whatever you’re doing is super important.

It makes your husband feel so loved, and he’ll want to talk to you more, and you want your husband to want to talk to you and have fun with you and do things with you. Because that’s companionship, and men, need companionship and someone to have fun with, and you want that to be you, not his guy friends.

34. Be A Caring Partner

How to keep your husband interested in you? My special tip on being a better wife is to make lunchbox notes. These are quick and easy, and I write a letter, and I put it in Jake’s lunch, and he opens it up, and it’s surprising and feels the love.

Send your husband surprise food. So I do this often, but I make sure that it’s on with my money since we have a budget, and this is an efficient way to show your husband that you love him. Because men love food, especially for my husband, who works tough long days, this is an excellent pick-me-up for him to have a surprise lunch.

35. Regular Kiss & Call

My best tip on being a perfect wife is to greet your husband at the door. I am sure to be there ready with a hug, kiss, and excited hello and tell him that I miss him and I’m so happy to see him. It is the best quality of a good wife.

If you do it every day, I guarantee you that your relationship never stops. You can be the best couple, and other couples jealousy you.

If you forget to do it, you can call your husband and tell him you miss him. Every husband and wife should call his/her partner at the office or free time. It makes a caring moment and healthy bond.

Bonus Tip: Have A Clean Bedroom

So not many of us might think about this one, but it’s been beneficial and vital to us to have a clean bedroom that initiates bedroom things. It doesn’t make you feel all cluttered, and you know things everywhere. It makes you only be able to focus on bedroom things.

Please make sure that our home is somewhere where my husband wants to be and is filled with a few things that he likes, and I intentionally check my attitude before he comes home and when he gets home from her, wherever he is. I want to make sure that I am coming across as endearing pleasant, and loving in how I both talk and act in the home.

I hope you will follow these qualities of a good wife. If you have any questions, then feel free to ask me anytime.

Frequently Asked Questions

Conclusion

So, understanding that your husband has his point of view will help you connect. It’s going to help you to be a better wife. You’re going to feel better, and you’re going to have that loving relationship that you so want.

We discuss some ways that you can instantly be a better wife. These are super practical things that you can start implementing right now to boost up your husband and help maintain a healthy marriage relationship.

If you have any questions, please ask in the comment section. Our marriage expert will solve your problems and give you the best way. So, don’t miss the chance and get a better solution for your life.

I wish you a happy married life. Stay with your husband and family. Cheers!

Read More: 20 Qualities Of A Good Husband