Do you want a perfect date? Then follow these common dating mistakes men make with girls. Now, I will go over the 30 most common mistakes in your dating life. There are many things that guys will go into the dating world doing that they think they have to do to get women. But these are the things that are repelling us and making us scared.
I want to give you the lowdown, and the honest opinion from a girl’s perspective on the biggest mistake men make when dating women. I can’t tell you how many clients I have had crushes on girls for years. They have never done anything about it. If you never try, nothing’s going to happen at all.
Sometimes getting rejected is far worse than not getting anything at all. Here’s what guys are always crazy about before sex, and we women are still crazy after sex. Why is that? Because we’re the ones who have to convince you to stick around.
30 Dating Mistakes Men Make
Dating today has many issues, notably the ADD culture we have as a society. We’re used to that instant hit of dopamine that we get from a bit of validation, whether it’s by a text or someone reaching out to us through a dating app. It used to be the case that a guy would go on a date and afterward, having had a great time.
We’re now looking for a standard of attraction that doesn’t exist in the real world. Like many life areas, dating has become the slot machine in Vegas, where I am looking for that next hit. It doesn’t bring me happiness, but it keeps me distracted.
1. Busy With Phone
In these modern times, most of us are addicted to the phone. But if you’re out of the date with someone you’re interested in, it should be about getting to know her those text messages, emails, and notifications aren’t going anywhere.
- They will be there after the date, and trust me, and your date is noticing if you’re not putting her front and center have what’s called present time consciousness.
If you’re out on a date with someone you’re interested in, she should be significant enough that getting to know her and getting to know you should be the utmost priority.
- Nobody, especially women, likes to be ignored or seem like you’re not that into them. Please, whatever you do on the date, put the phone away.
2. Talking Too Much About The Future
Another early dating mistake or dating problem is talking too much about the past or the future. Here’s the thing when you’re first getting to know someone.
- Nobody wants to get too heavy, and when you talk about the past, especially if you’re talking about exes, there’s no upside to discussing other women.
Women who didn’t work out leave that out, but on the opposite end of the spectrum don’t talk too much about the future.
- If you find yourself into this woman, don’t start talking about marriage and how many kids you want to have again soon. You might scare her off deal with the here and now, get to know her to learn each other’s likes and dislikes.
3. Showing Less Personality
Don’t talk too much about yourself. Many guys make bragging showing off nobody wants to hear that you’re there to get to know each other. Make sure it’s a balance of her talking about her.
- You are talking about yourself and asking each other questions about one another. This may come off as old school or a bit traditional, but in my opinion, women like to talk more than men. If she’s out with you and you’re doing all the talking, she’s not going to like it.
- Here’s another huge mistake that men have always made and trying to get too physical. She’s lovely. It’s hard to keep your hands off of her. Please resist the urge at the beginning that can be very off-putting to women, and here’s a little secret. If she wants to get physical with you, she’s made that decision pretty quickly. Let it happen organically.
She’s already going to decide whether she’s interested in that area. All you can do is talk her out of it, keep your mouth closed. Talking about it or being too handsy is never a great approach. These types of things usually happen best when they happen naturally.
4. Having A Financial Problem
How much you’re going to spend. You’re probably not in the financial position that you should be dating in the first place.
- Dating costs money. If you don’t have it get on your grind, save up and then get back into the dating game. However, I’m not suggesting that you should be throwing money at women or going over the top or extravagant. I’m saying don’t be cheap. No woman likes that.
I generally don’t go over the lid on the date. When I’m trying to get to know someone, I’ll probably meet them for some coffee or drink. It’s a great way to have a quiet conversation get to know someone. See if you want to go any further, but we’re going to step it up a little bit on subsequent dates.
- Good women don’t want a cheap guy. If she’s thinking long term, she wants to know if you’re going to be stable, and provide being cheap shows an inability or an unwillingness to do.
5. Careless Behaviors
Many modern guys, especially on the internet, feel like you shouldn’t care what women want or like. I’m not saying you should be ruled by what women like. You should be aware of and act accordingly.
- Don’t make the mistake of thinking you should be the super alpha guy that shouldn’t care what women like. Don’t make the mistake of thinking you shouldn’t be aware of what women want.
For example, You shouldn’t put all your eggs in one basket. It can lead to you overvaluing that one particular woman. It can easily lead to you putting her on a pedestal.
- You have to date around to find out what you like and what you don’t like. Focusing on that one woman that you have this massive crush on is fraught with a problem. It can put you in a weak, submissive position.
So initially, when you first start dating, don’t date one woman. Once you figure out the one you like, then it’s okay to put all your effort and attention into her.
6. Giving Excessive Effort
You should be aware of what women like but don’t go out of your way to please them. Don’t fall all over yourself, trying to make her feel good. Yes, it’s okay to be kind. It’s okay to be polite and generous but don’t put her up on a pedestal. Mainly you don’t even know her yet.
- Be polite, be kind but don’t be a pushover. Some women will take advantage of it, and it will seem like she likes and, to be honest with you. she doesn’t respect you.
- Don’t date from a submissiveness position, but on the opposite end of the spectrum, don’t make this other mistake. Do not be too rigid. I say that’s not cool either don’t try to be Mr cool.
7. Lack Of Self Development
The priority is making sure you’re on the path to being the best version of yourself. You can be when you’re a man who’s on purpose. You’ll notice you attract more of the women you like. It is that women don’t want a man who only thinks about them.
They want you to have other outside interests. This is where your hobbies and your goals come into play. You’ll notice dating gets a lot easier.
- Now I want you to be aware of what women like. I don’t want you obsessed with it, though, although dating is essential. What’s most important is being on your purpose.
8. Giving Extra Priority
There are many elements in different pieces of what people do when dating a woman and what men do when dating a woman.
- The biggest mistake that men make is they prioritize a woman. There’s a confusion between pursuing and prioritizing.
When you pursue a woman, it’s because you’re trying to get to know her. There’s a healthy balance, and this stuff is something that cannot be faked, guys. If you fake an abundance of your life, your energies will be different, and women are intuitive. So what’s important is that you do create an experience of mine.
- Prioritizing is putting a woman before your self meeting your needs early on there. So many times that I see men getting into dating a woman in two weeks in already, he forgets about his life. He’s not focused on his goals.
He’s doing things that will make this woman think that okay. I’m here to tell you women want to be somewhat pursued, but they also want to pursue a man. It’s like that mystery component that many of us fight for, and you have to think of it a lot of times.
9. Being A Possessive Man
The funny dating mistake men make with women is telling that this is the most beautiful woman, and you’ve never experienced a little bit like this before. Let me tell you why guys often do this because you operate from your prefrontal cortex.
Men are inherited in us, and you excuse me for you to operate from your prefrontal cortex, and women operate from intuition. It’s different. I get into scientific stuff in regards to this into my boot camps.
- You have to understand how your brain is operated to work when you see a woman.
We might think that she’s the most beautiful woman and that you’ve never experienced a woman like this before. She gave you the feeling, and the kiss was so passionate. You’re like, oh my gosh, this is the one, so then we start to do this.
- The biggest mistake you’re making is you don’t even know this woman yet.
You don’t take the time; what happens is a beautiful woman and an amazing woman. She knows it herself, and she does not want a man that will be easy treating her like as.
- It’s a beautiful thing that you can see a woman as a prize. But you have to understand too that you are a prize as well.
10. Expectation In Short Time
I have many clients, and lately, they have had no problem having a good time with women making them laugh and creating chemistry. I figured here’s the thing, we women don’t want to be seen as sexual aggressors. We never want to be in that position.
We don’t want you to think of us as easy, or you’re slutty, or she does this with every guy. We’re going to sit there and wait until Kingdom comes for you to make moves.
- If you have a problem doing so, you’re going to have a problem being alone for the rest of your life.
11. Your Desperate Vibe
You love that girl. She’s fantastic. You want her and only her, but having the mentality will hurt you in the long run.
- When you have this mentality that you have nobody else out there and don’t stand a chance with anyone else, you’re going to put off a very desperate vibe.
- No woman wants to be with a guy who’s desperate to have her. Who else puts off a vibe like he’s desperate to have us? If you’re sitting there and getting hell-bent over one girl or thinking like there’s no one else, it isn’t ever come around. No one else will ever come around. She probably won’t even come about either.
12. Giving Too Much Attention
Many guys think they have to text her or always postpone plans for her. They are giving us shit even though we’ve never given you anything in our lives. Here’s the thing. You’re already giving, which is you. You’re the amazing thing she gets.
- If you are giving her anything extra than your time and attention, she’s not reciprocating.
Giving her more when she’s not even reciprocating the effort you’re giving her now will only provide you with more hassle.
- Don’t bother until you get back in return, and giving her more will never get anything back in return. It’s going to make us feel obligated. I guess I’ll answer one of his decks.
So, please don’t do it. What does it do? You’re rewarding us for not giving you as much in return.
13. Feeling Insignificant About Yourself
She’s the only one out there who is getting upset over other guys. She’s not the only girl out there that you could be going for.
- You’re not the only guy out there that she could be going for. Getting all bent out of shape is pointless.
- It’s only going to make it look like we should look at these other guys. What are you getting so scared of this? Is there something I don’t know about you that I should be looking at other guys?
When you worry about other guys talking to her, her talking to other guys, or other guys thinking she’s beautiful. What you’re saying is that you’re not worthy enough to stay with you. If you feel like that about yourself, we will think that about you too.
14. Showing Disrespect In Front Of Her
I don’t want to think of her that way. She’s a delicate flower. Guess what? Flower wants to be pounded into the ground with your penis. We’ll find another guy if you don’t think of us like that. Why will you disrespect me by thinking that I am not part of the human race with genitals?
- What you’re doing is you’re disrespecting me as a woman by thinking that I don’t want to get womanly with you. I can’t tell you how insulted it is for a woman to be rejected by someone sexually. You think that we don’t want to be sexual with men is very insulting.
15. Your Shifty Attitude
If you have a victim mentality attitude, that is a major turnoff. What that translates to for a woman is that you can’t handle life.
- If you can’t take life on your own, how will she be able to trust you to handle life when you’re in a relationship. Life throws crap at you because life will throw crap at you. That’s part of being a human. How you handle it and your attitude toward it will reveal a lot about your characters.
You always agree with her instead of respectfully standing up for your own opinions. She will lose respect for you if you don’t handle the test well. You walk away, and she’s going to look at you and think you’re weak and again don’t know how to handle a woman she needs you to handle.
16. Insecure Body Language
Insecure body language is one of the common dating mistakes men make. When you have insecure body language, a woman will be turned off before meeting you. What does insecure body language look like? Poor posture can come from excessive gaming or too much time on the computer.
It is also a sign of low self-esteem, insecurity, depression, and sometimes even mental health issues. None of which are a turn-on.
- The best thing you can do with body language is to stand up straight, shoulders back, chin up and walk with purposeful strides. You don’t have to walk fast but long confident strides. Another thing that you can do to increase the Alpha confident body language.
17. Giving Unnatural Compliments
Bragging or boasting women are subtle, and we pick up on all kinds of subtle hints, unlike men do. If you’re going to boast or brag, you want to make sure you’re doing it so subtly that you don’t think she’s going to even pick up on it.
For example, You say you’re proud of your job or car and proud of your accomplishments. It’s okay to slip it into the conversation as long as you’re not saying it directly to impress her.
- If you’re trying to impress her by saying it, that’s going to be a turn-off. If it comes up naturally or somewhat organically in a conversation, it’s not a turn-off. It’s also revealing evidence of your accomplishment, or it could be a social status. It could be a financial status. It could be physical or health status. It is you feel that it might be something that would be impressive to her.
- You must find a way to put it into the cover, put it into the conversation in a way that isn’t obvious. If you have a great job, you can ask her a vote about her career or what she likes about her job, and that’s a natural way to say. If you work for yourself, you can say you enjoy working for yourself. You can tell why you love working for yourself.
18. Fear To Express Personal Opinions
A woman wants to know that you have an opinion. Because she doesn’t always think she’s going to be right about things.
- If you still agree with her, she can’t trust that she can lean on you or rely on you when she doesn’t know what to do about something in life.
Or, when you’re struggling together as a team with something, she needs to trust that you can have an opinion of your own that might get you both to a better place in life.
- You have confidence in your own opinions and ideas and solutions and values and the whole thing. If you continuously agree with her and that’s going to come across as a weakness.
- You need to find things that you disagree on and then have conversations about that. Not necessarily arguments at some point in time, you are going to argue. But you want to be able to have healthy debates.
It is about the pros and cons of different philosophies and opinions about life. That will be more impressive to her than if you agree with everything she says if you can do that.
19. Having An Inauthentic Personality
It ties in with always agreeing with her if you are inauthentic. Because you are trying to be the type of person you think she wants. You’re going to have to play that role for the rest of your life with her. It’s not going to feel good. She’s going to sense it because women are intuitive. We can sense these things, and there will be something that doesn’t fit and feel right for her.
There’s going to be an incongruent between who you’re portraying and who you are. You’ll also be a lot happier if you be who you are and what that essentially looks like in the real world. It is doing the things that you enjoy doing unapologetically.
- If you’re a gamer, it is excellent. Be a gamer! If you are an athlete, be an athlete. Don’t try to downplay who you are and what your interests are for someone else.
There will be some happy medium and some common ground to be compatible. If there isn’t, she’s not the right person for you anyway. It’s better to find that out sooner than later. So, be who you are. Do not compromise on your personality or your interests for anyone else.
20. Decision-Making Weakness
Your own decisions are pretty much everything. The best way to practice having a different outlook is within your friendship groups or your work peers.
- Instead of agreeing with or not even agreeing with people sitting back apathetically and not contributing, you work with people. Start thinking about what people are talking about and process that within yourself, and decide which things you agree with and what you might choose not to agree with her.
- The best thing you can do is practice speaking up about something you disagree with her. It may be challenging at first. If you’re struggling with meeting women or being shy, it’s exacerbated by our behaviors of wanting to please others and not create discourse.
What you need to do is to start speaking up about things you disagree with. When it’s not as important as it is, you need to practice and disagree with a woman and have your own decisions when it counts. You can’t be like, ‘I don’t even know what I agree with’ It makes you weak. Women do not like vulnerable men. Your weakness is one of the biggest dating mistakes.
21. Nervousness Of Conversation
You need to be able to carry on conversations. The tip for keeping a conversation is going, and the thing is you need not be too worried about awkward silences.
- Silence is only awkward if you feel awkward. Sometimes silences are comfortable. There can be comfortable silences. You don’t have to fill every gap with chitchat or conversation.
- Another tip for conversation is asking her open-ended questions, like, ‘Do you like pizza?’ is a closed-ended question. What kind of pizza is your favorite pizza? Where is the favorite best pizza you’ve had in the city?
At the end of that, you can expect. Don’t be nervous. It is easy to say, don’t be nervous. If you are unstable, try to focus on your sentence. What can you see? What can you smell? It should get you grounded again. It’s one thing you can do there.
22. When You Fail To Make Eye Contact
If you are continually looking away and can’t maintain eye contact, that is a sign of insecurity weakness.
- You need to be able to maintain eye contact about 80% of the time. So you’re looking at her for about eighty percent of the time.
You might glance away when you’re thinking about something, and you’re going to maintain eye contact.
- Don’t be staring down like a shy guy. It’s okay, no, but you need to show and maintain eye contact because that displays confidence. It also brings her into the intimate fold of air conversation.
23. Acting Like Selfish
We try to protect ourselves against rejection mostly. We might have commitment issues, which are super familiar if you try and get someone to help you overcome that because it’s the most debilitating, horrible thing ever in life.
- Life is all about making meaningful connections to people. If you’re not able to do that, then that’s hard and difficult. We try to protect ourselves, so we put up a wall where we act very casual about the dating process to defend ourselves and make the other person feel like we don’t care that much well.
It’s a terrible idea because it gives us a vibe that you’re not interested in them. It also gives them a vibe that you’re not trying at all to get with them. If someone didn’t ride it with you, you wouldn’t like that either. It wholly ruins the whole thing and its self-sabotage in every way. So try to avoid that. It’s hard to open up your heart.
I will show you that I care, am interested in you, and am willing to work for you. If you’re going to reject me anyway, that will hurt me greatly. But at least I’ve had an actual shot because if you don’t do that, if you don’t open up to someone, then you’re never going to have a shot. So it’s going to be self-sabotage.
24. Revealing Insecurities On Date
It is not smart in many situations to reveal your insecurities to people. I tend to be very open about my feelings because I don’t feel like my feelings make me weak or less in control.
- You have to realize that people will take advantage of your insecurities. Or your insecurities make them initially think that you’re an insecure person so which is not valid.
- If you have insecurities, that does not mean you’re a secure person because everyone has insecurities. But if you talk about your insecurities, too many people can feel like you’re generally insecure, and that’s unattractive. In general, it comes with happiness and confidence, and everything we like, someone that can make us feel better about ourselves.
So if someone is more confident than us or feels like they’re more confident than us, we are attracted to them. Because we want to be sure someone seems happy, we are tempted because we want to be satisfied. In reality, nobody is confident. Nobody is that happy. So I’m not saying that you should never talk about your insecurities, but maybe your date is not a great idea.
25. Addicted To Internet Media
It’s superior to FaceTime someone or to call someone or meet up with them in real life. Texting is tiring because it is detached from the real world.
- So you end up not having so much to talk about something. It’s the most boring environment to have a conversation ever.
It can be fun to exchange a few texts, and it doesn’t mean you have to text always. It’s a lot nicer to also speak to someone through other mediums. That’s a huge mistake that people make is to talk over text.
26. Unwillingness Of Hard Work
Men are built for competition. Are you complaining that it’s too much hard work when you’re trying to get the job? You’ve always wanted when you were trying to get into that great college. It shouldn’t be that hard to study to get into this great school.
So I can have a career. It’s too much finding a mate is as important as those other things. Why shouldn’t you have to work hard? Why shouldn’t you compete against other guys as you do for their job or that spot at that great school?
- Being a good guy isn’t enough. You have to compete, know what women like, and go for the women. It’s a big mistake if you think you shouldn’t have to work hard to find a good woman.
27. As Usual Thinking
We got another problem that’s a modern one. Many of you guys out there only look for women on dating apps. It’s a big mistake. These apps are convenient, but they rely too heavily on the superficial side.
- If you’re not meeting her out in the real world and having an actual conversation, what else can she judge you by? That’s why you got to get out of the house. Sometimes you might want to meet a woman in the real world.
It can lead to a better initial connection. In my opinion, now that doesn’t mean I don’t think you should use dating apps. But be aware that they will lead to more initial superficial connections.
28. Talking About Religion & Politics
You should not talk about religion or politics. These are potential minefields. When you’re getting to know someone, you’ll have plenty of time. These topics are too heavy when you’re first getting to know someone, and they can easily lead to arguments or debate.
- Arguing and debating is not the proper way to go about having an initial date. Leave those discussions to once you realize you like each other, and you can accept potential differences.
There are lots of advantages to different opinions. You can learn more and talk about something new.
- Don’t be aggressive and be a good listener. You can use your sense of humor when you talk about something opposite. If any woman discovers that you are a realistic and intelligent person, she is definitely with you.
29. All-Time Consideration
Sometimes men think that for me to court and pursue this woman, I have to go all-in, which means you’re sending her all these text messages. You’re forgetting that you have tennis matches on Saturday night, and instead of you’re hanging out with her every Saturday.
Or when she says jump, you’re like, how high do you want me to jump type of thing, and that’s the thing is you lose the opportunity within yourself. You forget about your own life, and that’s what we can not do. This is the time I want you guys to understand.
- When you’re dating, the most significant opportunity you can do is the opposite of what you think is right sometimes. That is showcasing your independence because remember independence is significant in relationships in general. This starts to show in the beginning when you start dating a woman.
It shows no emotional control if you don’t show this in the beginning and date a woman. Women look for a man with that masculine presence because a male controls his emotions that come into massive energy. So don’t take that away from a woman. Let her also have the opportunity to do this.
30. Fear Of Losing Her
It is a big one. It comes back to self-esteem. It is you who think she’s out of your league. One of the things you have to remember is that we tend to date people about the same level. But women tend to want to date someone who’s at least at her level or a little bit higher, at least perception-wise. So, that doesn’t mean you are better than her in any way.
I mean, the better is subjective, but for this article, you don’t want to be acting like she’s better than you. What you have to do is how you can handle this.
- You need to remember that all women, no matter how gorgeous they are, all women have insecurities. There’s something about her body or her personality or something about herself that she doesn’t like, and she’s insecure about that.
- You have to remember it. It is true. Almost all women, any woman you’re going to be interested in, will have insecurity. It’s going to have flaws. You must remember that women have flaws. Not physical, but personality flaws, mental-spiritual whatever it is.
We all have insecurities, and you need to be able to believe that. Otherwise, it’s going to show up again in your interactions. If you don’t believe you’re good enough for her, she’s not going to trust that you’re good enough for her. It’s contagious.
How do you deal with her? You’ve got to remember and go into every interaction, believing and knowing that something about her isn’t perfect. When you do that, you’re not going to start putting her on a pedestal. It’s the worst thing you can do at the beginning of any relationship.
In a relationship, you’re both putting each other on a pedestal. Within a relationship, it’s not healthy. It’s going to make you look weak and needy and not good enough. You don’t think you’re good enough. She’s not going to think you’re good enough.
I’m telling you guys these are the keys you need to understand to stop making these mistakes. They might come off as needy behavior, whatever you may classify it as. But the ultimate key in regards to any of these tips that I’ve given you in this article. It’s so important to live in happiness for yourself and be understanding.
This is why you’re here now because you need to have education regarding attraction relationships. If you can implement the tools I’m giving you in this product, you will change this overall. If these are the mistakes you are making, and I welcome your comments and questions below, share this with someone.
Read More: Top Dating Advice For Men